Posts by Wants2bfree

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If you have thoughts of suicide call: 911, 800 – SUICIDE (784-2433), or go to the nearest emergency room.

  • A different perspective

    I just found out that a friend of mine attempted suicide right after I talked to him last night. It opened my eyes more to my past behavior. When I felt the helplessness and frusteration, and the feelings of ‘one day he really is going to die’ and wished there was something I could do,…

  • 3 months!

    I am 3 months si free! I thought I was never gonna quit. But now I hardly ever think about it. After it had been a couple of months I started having some eating behaviors, and almost progressed into a eating disorder, but I thought about the toll that si took on my life, and…

  • Self injury is knocking

    I’m all alone in my house with nothing to do or nobody to talk to, just living a lonely existance. All my friends and family are busy with their own lives. I have nobody to share my life with, I just sit in solitude, and then self injury knocks on the doors of my heart…

  • When doing right doesnt feel right

    I have quit injuring. Now I have been temped with eating behaviors. At first I gave in I wanted them so bad, accually I have been temped with them on and off since I was a teenager, just hardly ever acted on them. Then I decided I didn’t want to go down that path. I…

  • Doing better

    So finnally after after all the fighting I have done, and the tears, and scars. I have reached a point that life is tolerable, even enjoyable. I never thought that I would get past wishing my life would end, but I am. Best of all this has lasted for some time for me, not just…

  • Alone

    Im so sick of feeling alone. I just got into it with my sister. Big suprise, she never has been supportive. My other sister and i talk, but never about anything really meaningful. My brother doesnt even talk to me. I Only have a couple friend who even try, but they dont get it. My…

  • Want to do better.

    When i see that i just walked to the store at 12:30 at night in the sleet with my feet getting wet, and the sleet beating against my face just to get a pack of ciggarettes, i loathe myself. To think that just a week and a half ago, i missed class, because i didnt…

  • Nervious about school

    So Im Starting school tommorrow, and im a little anxious. I graduated high school almost 8 years ago, so im worried about my study skills, and my skillsw in general. Also im worried, cause now all of a sudden just in time for school to start, the doc is talking about changing some of my…

  • Starting over with my wall of numbness down.

    So I had made it to 5 months si free. Then i relapsed again, which by the way was very disappointing, since i was alomost to the 7.5 month mark which is the longest ive gone. But any way i am doing muck better over all anyway. Not numb anymore like i used to be…

  • suffering in silence

    So i posted yesterday “i really sont know how im gonna this” Im going downhilll fast! I made the mistake of not calling yasterday to get into greif counceling, mostly cause i was realing, and in shock. But when i called around today, no one could see me unless i went to the emergancy room….