Posts by soldiermp12

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If you have thoughts of suicide call: 911, 800 – SUICIDE (784-2433), or go to the nearest emergency room.

  • Why can’t I trust anyone?

    It has been over two years since I felt I was completly alone. Two years since I SIed. Why now is it I feel the pull back to what I swore I would never do again. Its so confussing and as everyone knows trying to talk to someone is almost impossible. What makes matters worse is that…

  • lost

    i feel so alone write now….. i feel like the emotions are overwhelming me. WHY tho im supposed to be strong im supossed to be a leader. i talked to the army physhcolgists and instead of trying to help me figure out a way to stop all he could think about was threating me and…

  • WHEN WILL IT END!!!!!!!!!!!!

    WHY i was so close i was doing so well….. Last night i relapsed 2 weeks i was doing so well not happy but well. than i felt it i felt the anger growing inside of me filling me completing me. i tried the steps i counted to ten and took ten deep breaths. i…

  • Failing

    Hey all so i told the military that i SI and well they took it all the wrong way.first they think all the wrong things.  I tried to tell them why i do it, but they don’t get it.  Now they think that im crazy and are threating to kick me out of the army. i told them…

  • I TOLD AND NOW IM SCARED

    Hey all well its been awhile since my last entry and theres ben alot happen since then. i found someone that i can talk to about whats happening (SIing) and it helps but there is a little age gap so its a little awkward.  Well if you’ve read these before you knoew that I was…

  • BETRAYED

     Well everything that everyone has told me to do to start the dealing process just blew up in my face.  I came to this site because i really didn’t know where else to go or who to talk to, the last chance sort of thing. Everyone kept telling me to “tell someone it helps find…

  • WHATS WRONG WITH ME

    Hey all so i thought I was getting better but im definatly not. I want to screm I want to just end I cant deal with it anymore. I want to tell someone but if i do and the miltary finds out im finished. im sick of putting that stupid smile on my face im sick…

  • THANKS TO ALL

    To everyone, First of all I want to thank you all for your comments and concerns. Im not really sure if im going to go to my chain of command yet but, there were a few ideas that I think I might try. By no means am I saying that Im cured lol far from it…

  • SOLDIERS NEED HELP TOO RIGHT

    Hey all this is my first post and its nice to find a place where you can talk about SIing and not be looked at like your a crazy……Well as the title says I am a soldier currently deployed to Iraq and I really didn’t start to SI bad until I got here. When I…

  • SOLDIER IN NEED

    Hey all im new to this site but not new to SI.im a Soldier serving in Iraq right now and im not really sure how to deal wtih the problem this time. when i was in high school i could talk about it with my friend, but here it is a little different. im supposed…