It has been many many years sense I’ve been on here. You know how you try to grow up and start life and leave all behind. As the years have gone I’ve been blessed to much with my awesome husband and wonderful beautiful daughter and super understanding friends. Despite all of that the thoughts and images of self injury keep getting worse and worse. I’ll be doing the dishes and surly enough the thoughts of self injury creep in even when I’m taking a walk with my daughter. I’ve caught myself grabbing sharp things and putting them to my arms but thankfully I can pull myself back. I’ve struggled with depression for as long as I can remember but getting Post partum depression was a whole new level of self hate and depression, I didn’t know it could get any worse until then. It’s just getting so hard to not hurt. I want to punish myself for not being the wife or mother my husband and daughter deserve. Where and what do I do from here?