Lately I am realizing that I don’t want to talk to anyone, but I just want to harm myself instead. Two reasons. 1. It’s easier to harm myself than it is to talk about what is really going on and 2. I don’t have to worry about bothering anyone. But I know this way of thinking is unhealthy, I just know there is something I am afraid to talk about and to face. I can’t spiral in to this pattern, I just can’t. I have to tell those few who know my secret that I am feeling like this, just so they are aware that this is a problem for me right now.