I feel guilty about being so insecure all the time. Over the past few years I’ve stayed in contact with an individual who has been a really good support for me. I don’t know how many times I’ve let my insecurities almost destroy our friendship over the years, but it’s definitely more than I would like to admit. I recently emailed the person about some things that were weighing really heavy on my mind and it’s been a few days and I haven’t got any sort of response. I’m trying to be rational about this and be understanding that our friendship is a long distance thing so it’s reasonable for responses to take a little bit of time and not be immediate. My insecurities have put a lot of distance in the friendship (from my perspective at least) so I don’t expect to get to talk to the person every day or anything like that. I’m trying not to let my emotional thinking overrule the rational thinking but it’s very challenging. I know that it’s not logical for me to get upset about not getting a response right away but I can’t help that my feelings put me in this position. I feel hurt by not hearing from the person who I’ve so often relied on when experiencing emotional difficulty. I know that the silence is probably for a good reason, I just wish that I could convince myself that it’s okay. I hate being so insecure about everything. Being insecure makes it so that by not hearing from the person I contacted I’ve now lowered my sense of worth. My brain spins things out of hand and everything builds up. So by not hearing from them I end up thinking that I said something wrong, that I’m too needy all the time, that I’m probably wearing out my support, that my support must not like me, that I’m an undesirable person, that no one likes me, that I’m worthless … it’s absurd that I let it escalate like this but I honestly feel as if it’s beyond my control.