I am getting really annoyed when I hear phrases like “it will all work out in the end”, “it will be okay”, “if it is meant to be, it will be”. I understand why others say this, and to some degree I know things will work out – they usually do. But in this moment right now I just need someone to listen and understand that I am anxious, nervous, sad, frustrated, lonely, etc… In this moment I need to know that I am supported, valued and loved, even if and when things don’t work out.
I need to practice how to live in the present. I am too focused on the past, what happened, the future and what I want (and then worry what will happen if I don’t get it). How do you live in the present moment and just worry, and also be grateful for, what is happening right now? I have learned these skills before, but my brain is to tired to remember the stuff that would actually be useful to me right now. I feel it might help a lot as I go into my last (and hopefully final) year of school to learn just to be in the moment sometimes.
I am so anxious. It will be a a difficult and busy year ahead. The year that people wait and watch to see if you sink or swim. Most of the time I can rise to the occasion and “swim”, but at what cost. I get too worked up, too stressed out, and too self-conscious about everything. I am also to hard on myself and automatically view SI as that source of punishment. I want it to be a good year, but I am already imagining the worse before it even starts. But “it will all work out for the best”, right?
I am exactly the same. I hate people telling me that it will be better, because right now, it’s not better. I can’t live in the moment and spend almost all of my waking hours thinking about the future and what will become of me if certain things do or do not happen. It haunts me. One thing I’ve found that helps me, is to love the little things that happen on a daily basis wholly and with all of my heart, and when they are gone, not being sad because I don’t have it any more, but being happy because I had that wonderful thing, even if it was just for a short period of time. For example,I love the smell of rain on hot sidewalk. When I smell that I let myself become completely enveloped in the moment. There is nothing but me the rain and the sidewalk. Or the stars. When it gets dark I look up to the sky to see the beauty that’s there all the time, even if it’s never noticed. I don’t let the hugeness of it all overwhelm me, instead I focus solely on how beautiful it is. So what are the little things that you love. Even if they don’t happen often or if you don’t see them all the time or even if you do, what are the things that full your tummy with soft happy butterflys? Just be careful not to compare all the other good things that happen to the things that already have. Try to see each new thing in a new light. Like all things this is by no means an immediate cure, but it might be a good place to start 🙂