Well, I feel like I’m officically Back At The Bottom. I really have very little to nothing to lose anymore. I finally cracked and SI’d again. I couldn’t hold out any longer, and can so not bring myself to tell my best friend because we literally share almost EVERYTHING with each other and I feel like she would A. Be so disappointed in me and B. Feel terrible because she couldn’t stop me. There have been so many occasions where she has succeded in at least distracting my hysterical self from doing thing I would definitely regret but unfortunately this was not one of those times. So basically, feeling like I’m circling the drain somedays. I feel like Without an emense amount of effort I don’t have the strength to care about people anymore. I don’t anyone near me. I don’t want anyone to talk to me. I don’t want to be close to anyone. You know, people really don’t have a clue, not one single CLUE what makes people tick. And the realy sad part is, Most people don’t care. They don’t care that they can be standing next to someone, live next to someone, WORK with someone everyday, or even DATE someone and not have a clue what hurts that person, what or who they love. What they like, what matters, what their bottom line is, or most importantly, What breaks their heart…… I really wish people would get up off their own selfishness and stop being horrible. It truly stinks that in this world, no one really cares about you, not really. People CONSTANTLY think things are funny that really ARENT. And they just keep going on thinking its ok. And that’s what things never truley get any better, because no one cares about trying to make things better. No, not at all….