Well, my family is out enjoying their weekend while I get to stay home to do homework and then go to work. Im tired of my schedule. But at the same time, Im enjoying this alone time. But I dont want to be doing homework. Ive been sitting here for an hour and just flipping through the internet looking for these sources that I need. And I keep finding them, reading them, and then zoning out. I dont know what to do. This assignment isnt hard. I shoudlve been done a while ago. I write 5 to 7 page papers in less than an hour! This isnt like me at all. I shouldnt only be half way done. This makes me want to go out and buy myself stuff. But I cant do that either because I have zero money until payday. And I know thats wrong too because I am refocusing my needs in a different way and thats not healthy for my budget. I know I will one day have a career, have the money to be able to spend freely while working one job. But right now its just hard. But I need to look for the positives in everything I guess. I already allowed one breakdown, i cant let it happen again. So starting today I will look for something positive in most everything I do. Even if I hate it. Even if ts driving me crazy. So the silver lining to this blog right now is not si-ing. And having to work later….i guess is to be able to make all my payments and stay current. One step at a time, Ill make it through today too, mainly because I cant afford to break apart again, because its taking a heck of a time to put myself back together perfectly. But I guess the cracks eventually show, because once something is broken, its never the same again huh? Oh well.. time to go look for the positives.