I don’t know what I will say in this post. I only now that what I need is to check in and that I do not want to check in with a person I know. I want to check in anonymously. Anonymity. I want to be just a voice without a body, without solid connections. I am out of town- seeing many people. Unable to sleep-that will change though. I command that I will write a bit then I will lay my phone down and I will lie down and I will sleep. And tomorrow I will continue sleeping until I am refreshed. I am going to wake up and feel good. I can use all the tools I need. I can take breaks. I can leave the crowd and go sit by myself am eat silly mall food. I do not owe anyone anything. I am powerful in my own. ….and I also really really really look forward to getting back home- I am out of town right now. I am so lucky that I come back to a day where I have therapy twice. I want to be back where I feel safe. What I have earned through all the work I’ve done is that I can step away and not only can I handle social situations but I’m mostly even comfortable. Familiarity though is the most precious thing – novel has been nice- it does feed me- but the familiar is what I love. My bed. My dog. My kitchen. My therapy schedule. I have more business to do here- need another full day- which I have. But I love the comfort of my routine. I think I’m getting tired. Good night