I realize that I need help, I admit that I’m in a bad place again. Although I realize this, I also realize that my refusal to seek professional help will undo any other forms of support or lines for help that previously existed. By refusing to ask for professional assistance, so I must also forfeit any friendships that may have existed. This time things are different … I’ll be in a bad place like I have been before but this time I won’t have anyone to help me through it. I don’t really know if I’m going to be able to get through the bad spot this time. I get lost inside the turmoil in my head so easily that sometimes I need someone to help pull me out of it, I’m just worried that I won’t find a way out this time … at least not the kind that keeps me around ….