I am still SI’ing. When I get in this depessed state I shut down. I dont want to talk at all. I have really great support from my mental health place. I have a good therapist, case worker, And I also go to group once a week. But I still am lost. I do not share much with people. My family does not know my degree of Mental Illness nor that I SI. I have 2 boys 20, and 24 yrs. And They think I am just depressed. I lost my husband in 1996 and have never really snapet out of it. I SI so I do not commit suicide. And latly that has been very strong. I feel alone most of the time because I do not let anyone in my life. It is so hard sometimes. Did I mention I take meds for my mental illness also , alot of meds. Sometimes I feel just like a drug addict, although my drugs are prescribed instead of off the streets. I feel I am no diffrent we all have mental problem , except we treat it all differnt. methods. well this is a first for me to write on this blog this much , thanks for caring to read it.