I’m sitting in the emergency room waiting. My partner is in a lot of pain, it got so bad she could barely move and I brought her here. The car died twice on the way to the hospital and I just can’t stop this anxiety. I spent the day with my whole family and my mom had a bottle of my previous drug of choice. A whole bottle right there and I wanted to take it so badly. SO badly. I’m feeling very overwhelmed right now. I’m very worried about my girlfriend and I’m extra worried because we’re gay and sometimes hospitals don’t look so kindly on that. I’m just crying constantly today and I want to hurt myself. I want to do it badly and severely and I want to feel better and safe.