I have so much on my mind but can’t put it into words. I have so many thoughts over powering my mind. I don’t get it. Honestly, I just don’t know. I want to escape. I want to get away from everyone and everything for awhile. No distractions. I want to be able to forget everything in my past. I’ve been getting urges to hurt myself more than ever and I don’t even know why. It’s a horrible habit now. I found this song awhile ago called Who I Am Hates Who I’ve Been by The Relient K and the one part says, “And I was positive that unless I got myself together, I would watch me fall apart. And I can’t let that happen again.” It use to help me a lot, but now it seems as if music isn’t even doing anything for me. Music is my escape and my everything.  It means everything to me but it seems to be fading and I don’t want that. I feel like when I listen to music, all I want to do is cry now. I don’t get it. Music is what I can relate to but everything’s just changing now and nothing feels right.