I’m really confuse about these mood swings I’ve had for weeks and weeks now. I can’t believe I haven’t acted out in the ways I used to. Of course that’s a good thing, but it’s mind blowing to me. I’m speaking for the past right now, I don’t know what I’ll do later or tomorrow or the next day-but i’d like to think I will do what I’ve done lately. These changes though are freaking me out. I never, ever want to live in those dark, distorted places. It’s so hard to get out. Some of the things I’ve done the past week to calm down enough to think and to sleep feel SO silly. But
in this list of new coping skills my therapist gave me, it says to “do what works” so I’m doing what works. Whatever it takes, I don’t want to relapse. I’m having all this anxiety again, ups and downs in these crazy immediate ways. One minute I feel GREAT, 30 minutes later I am really, really angry and overwhelmed. It’s exhausting.