I just feel so numb today… I have all these things that I have to to by tomorrow, but I just can’t get myself to do any of them…. I just sort of want to lie in my bed and just… just lie there all day. Not getting up, not speaking to anyone, just not caring about anything.

I’m so disappointed in myself.. I mean… this SI thing was supposed to be a one time thing, just a release of my emotions ONCE. Now it’s 3 years 6 years later… and well.. I’m still here, writing on SAFE, hoping to just magically recover. PATHETIC I know….

I just… I just feel so lonely.. you know??