I took an online survey about people who self harm yesterday, and I am mentally freaking out! When my dad took me to dance class, my hands were shaking, and I could hardly breath because I was panicking so much. As soon as I got to the church where the classes are taken at, I immediately went to the bathroom and self harmed. And after that I was so much calmer that I felt like I was myself again. It makes no sense, but I am petrified that someone will find out that I tool the survey. It was completely anonymous, so no one will find out, but I am still convinced that someone will find out.
it may also be because I turned in an assignment that mentioned my self harming issue. I just wrote everything out (NJ ASK prep) and didn’t think about anything until I had turned it in. Now I’m thinking, “oh my god! what the heck am I going to do?! this counts for a grade… what’s going to happen?” I’ll just find out today. I’ll pretend that everything is normal, and if nothing happens, thank God for letting me have teachers that don’t care or who think that I made this up.