I am so tired, the flashbacks won’t go away. Every time I close my eyes, and try to sleep, they haunt me. I feel the only way to end them is to SI- but I know this is a temporary solution. Sometimes I think the temporary solution is better than no solution at all. I don’t want to SI as I promised my family I would do my best to stop. I have tried using a sharpie to write on myself where I would SI, etc. Nothing seems to work. I read somewhere where to help a person stop SI’ing, one should wait 24 hours so it’s not impulsive. 24 hours right now seems like a lifetime.