Recently began a support group for s.i. A question came up on how to discuss s.i. with adolescent children whose parent is doing the s.i. Looking for any helpful info.
That’s a great question. I guess my first thought is how old the adolescent is and what they already are aware of. I would suspect the parent has been self injuring for a while, and the adolescent may have an idea this is happening already. Again, depending on their age, the book “Bodily Harm” (Conterio/Lader) does a great job of discussing the entire subject. It’s written so that an adolescent could read it.
You could also recommend this blog to the individual so they have someplace to go to talk about how they are feeling. If the parent is in your group – having them point out they are seeking help for this is also good. Self injuring with no plan to stop may give someone the idea that it’s a good way to solve problems, pointing out that (if they do) they realize it’s not the most effective way to resolve issues and they are working to change it – can be helpful.
All kids pick up on how their parents do, and don’t, cope with stress. Openly learning and USING positive coping strategies can be very helpful – actions speak louder than words.
If the person is in individual therapy, maybe it’d also be helpful to have a session that includes the adolescent.
Also, there is a FREE “Parent Webinar” for parents (or anyone) to understand more about self injury. While it’s for parents, it may be appropriate for the adolescent to watch too. You may want to preview it first to see, and obviously, this may depend on their age – there’s a difference between what a 13 or a 17 yr old wants/needs to hear :). Here is the link to that: http://store.selfinjury.com/products/Parents-Webinar%3A-by-Dr.-Wendy-Lader.html
Best wishes and it’s great that you started a group! 🙂
That’s a great question. I guess my first thought is how old the adolescent is and what they already are aware of. I would suspect the parent has been self injuring for a while, and the adolescent may have an idea this is happening already. Again, depending on their age, the book “Bodily Harm” (Conterio/Lader) does a great job of discussing the entire subject. It’s written so that an adolescent could read it.
You could also recommend this blog to the individual so they have someplace to go to talk about how they are feeling. If the parent is in your group – having them point out they are seeking help for this is also good. Self injuring with no plan to stop may give someone the idea that it’s a good way to solve problems, pointing out that (if they do) they realize it’s not the most effective way to resolve issues and they are working to change it – can be helpful.
All kids pick up on how their parents do, and don’t, cope with stress. Openly learning and USING positive coping strategies can be very helpful – actions speak louder than words.
If the person is in individual therapy, maybe it’d also be helpful to have a session that includes the adolescent.
Also, there is a FREE “Parent Webinar” for parents (or anyone) to understand more about self injury. While it’s for parents, it may be appropriate for the adolescent to watch too. You may want to preview it first to see, and obviously, this may depend on their age – there’s a difference between what a 13 or a 17 yr old wants/needs to hear :). Here is the link to that:
http://store.selfinjury.com/products/Parents-Webinar%3A-by-Dr.-Wendy-Lader.html
Best wishes and it’s great that you started a group! 🙂
Pam