This is my first post and I still am understanding how this all works. I am a teen, a freshman. I have had a history of SI and think my family has too. My sister attempted suicide a couple summers ago and has had eating disorders for a couple years. I am scared of everything right now and what the world will be like the next couple years. Last fall I was Sexually assulted by a boy and it never really effected me till the past couple months. Another boy told everyone lies and now its like I can’t even walked through the halls or go to class without being starred at with eyes that could kill or like I am some sort of freak, but the worst is when they get into there groups and call me out in front of everyone. The boy that told everyone lies finally had the nerve to say hi and laugh at me the other day and now i have 3 out of my 5 classes with him. He keeps trying to talk to me and then he laughs at me like I am some play toy. Today when I got home I SI. Then my aunt kept knocking at my door when I answered she asked if i was ok and i cryed in her arms for awhile but I couldnt tell her about anything. I cant tell anyone ever. I have tryed but I am scared more scared than I thought I could ever be. I dont feel like moving or talking, just laying and hopeing to sleep for days and days.