So… I’ve still been struggling against SI. Just not as badly as before… I go… and I try… I try to gain my moms acceptance and talk to her about how her day has been. What does she do? Wonders where my brother is instead. Like I’m not even there. He comes into the room, and his personality immediately grabs her. Immediately she listens to him. I’ve already been in her room, attempting to talk. And as soon as I do, her only response while I’m talking about my friend, is “is that the bi one?”. It’s like whatever… guess I won’t talk if that is my response. So my bro keeps talking, and she completely is paying attention to him… his comedic laid back attitude just covers my depression like I don’t exist. I guess I don’t exist to her. Nothing but dirt now, aren’t I?
Your not dirt. Im not making excusses for your mom but my guess i she doesnt really understand wat depression is and how some of the actionn that you make can mmke it worse. Its goodyou are trying keep trying to talk and aoo he will tealize that i have another kid who needs me to nd if she doesnt juut mo there are other people that will listen if you need someone to talk to and shes not there for you. Um sure your brother doest mean to get all theattention like he does nd i no how it feela to feel like your invisible, but keep making you presence known nd soon people will listen.
Sorry for all the typos
Never think you are dirt, you are a beautiful human. Maybe your mom is maybe afraid to talk.Not scared to talk to you, but just what you want to talk about. I’m not sure about the whole brother thing, but keep trying to talk with her, write her a letter maybe then she can understand. Because its easier to write your feeling when you can’t show them. Maybe your mom might even write back who knows 🙂
You’re definitely not dirt. Your personality is different than your brother’s and your mom may know how to interact with that personality more than with yours. That doesn’t make it an excuse for her not to try though. I would try to talk to her about how you feel a little lost and invisible. Just be careful that you don’t work yourself to death to be accepted by your mom. She should accept and love you because you’re her daughter. You don’t have to work for her acceptance. try and make yourself happy and learn to accept and love yourself.