I’m feeling a little more put together every day since my last relapse. Slowly getting back up and dusting the dirt off. As I was driving to work this afternoon I felt like I was hit in the gut with all of this guilt and shame. Things I did while under the influence, things I missed, etc. It was such a powerful feeling, it took me totally off guard. I try not to think about it, I try not to cry over it but I know these are things I’m going to have to go through to heal. I thought self injury was the way to go today. My first thought in reaction to the guilt and shame was to hurt myself. Punish myself with a physical pain. It was my first thought but then I remembered just because I have a thought or a feeling doesn’t mean I have to act on it. This is a concept that if I can put into practice, may be one of the most useful things I’ve been taught. It’s genius! And so simple!