EIGHT WEEKS!!! Yes, you heard me! Eight weeks withOUT SI! This summer, I didn’t even think this would be possible! I thought going one day was a miracle, which some days I still feel like if I make it through then it’s a miracle, but eight weeks! It’s almost hard to comprehend. SOOOOO much has happened!
Being home for the summer was the main reason I got into SI so badly this past summer. It was awful and it was worse than it ever was. I thought that there was no way out of the emotional abuse I was enduring and I didn’t know how to react to it, so I turned back to SI.
But God knew just how my life would change only a couple months after coming back to college! God has our best interests at heart, everyone! He will never leave you and He is your refuge and strength! If I had just embraced that this summer, it may have been easier to handle everything going on around me. I eventually realized that God was there the whole time to carry the weight of hurt that I was trying to handle myself and the summer got a little bitter, but eight weeks is the longest since February!
So…I’m here to say, everyone, that it IS possible to fight. It’s NOT easy…trust me, there were days when I just wanted to give up because it just seemed pointless to fight. But there IS a point to it! I’m getting counseling here at my college and I met an AMAZING guy this semester who knows what I struggle with and is living His life for God. He is so encouraging and supportive–I never would have thought this would happen! I didn’t think I deserved a great guy. But every girl is a princess who deserves a prince! DON’T SETTLE!!!
To everyone who feels like there is no hope, I know that feeling. Believe me. But there IS hope in God! He doesn’t want you to hurt or to hurt yourself. He wants you to be living a life full of joy because of what He has done for you! He loves you more than anyone ever could! I’ve gone eight weeks and I have never been happier. I’ve had off days, but then I think about the bigger picture. God loves me and doesn’t want me in pain and I can handle this emotional pain in a way that won’t cause me more pain. SI is not something I want to be fighting and dealing with in five years. I want this in my past.
I’m praying for all of you! God bless!!