because my pdoc has a moratorium on my mental health help and she hates me NO LIE Ok a strong word but she does not like me. they wanted me to stay stay the way things were with a sick t who has had major cancer and has pain issues. i could not do that. i’ve asked fro a transfer before but the t who had cancer J said o who can say things any different. Well many for one thing! from what i’ve seen they’re trying to keep j in job security so she doesn’t have to take early retirement. new patients are hard and i’m old to the system so i am frustrating as j told me. I am grieving leaving therapy permanently and getting off of all meds. When someone tells you you only need to be seen for si and depression well its a little to late then isn’t it? so i’ll do better on my own. I do have some plans in place and i just have to get over this hump of missing my pdoc nurse who has been my nurse for many years and my cac therapist. All my other contacts are gone already/. retired moved away got out when the getting was smart! its very early in the mornign well looky there it was 2;30 A.M. NOT VERY LONG AGO AND NOW ITS 6. THE SUN IS COMING UP. i’m tryi8ng not to go downa slippery slope and its hard. i don’t want to spend 30.00 a visit for healthcare anymore. its 1500. a mons.