Reading the entries on here tonight, I noticed one common theme kept coming up — the pressure to be or appear “perfect.” I have this also, this fear of failing, disappointing people, or not meeting expectations. I think for me it’s been part of my problem. I hate the pressure so much that sometimes I purposefully mess up just to get rid of it. I don’t want anybody to think I’m perfect. It makes me very uncomfortable. I’m not better than other people. I try to avoid any situation in which I have to pose as “good” or better than others. These situations are triggers for me. Knowing I can’t keep up the good appearance, I just want to sabotage it as soon as possible afterwards.