what are you doing??? who you are right now? thats not you. youve changed and its scary to me. when we went out the other day i didnt feel like it used to. we dont laugh anymore…not really at least. your always angry and i cant seem to get you away from him long enough to show you that he is not good for you. hes an  angry, alchoholic, druggie that has no respect for you at all. im not saying leave him because of his problems but how do you not see that he doesnt want to make you happy, he only wants to make himself happy. you used to be the strong one that wouldnt let anyone push you around but ever since you got with him you forgot that you too are a person! you forgot that you deserve to be happy too that you deserve a real life where buying food or paying for a place to live should not be a constant problem. when we were growing up we always talked about the amazing things we were gonna do with our lives. wed stay up late talking about how perfect things were gonna be…do you remember that at all? your having a kid now and things are gonna be much harder and since i will be an aunt i do not want my niece/nephew to grow up and have a lousy life. pull yourself together please because i cant stand to watch you fall any further anymore. do it for you, for your baby..just please go back to being the person i once knew. i miss you