I haven’t self harmed myself in one year, but recently pressures of school is getting to me. Paper due here, project due there. Test here, test there, tests EVERYWHERE! I recently I have found out that my friend was raped again, for the second time by the same guy. When I was hanging out with her, she fell asleep and I sat there and watched her convulse and punch pillows because she was dreaming about happening to her again. I did self harm myself that night, it was two weeks ago actually, because it reminded me of myself. I was doing so good but I guess everything just piled up and up. I feel guilty about it, I do. When my mom asks me how I am doing with it, I lied and said “Fine.” Truth is that I have been having those urges for such a long time now and I finally gave in. I am not perfect and I try to be. It gets so tiring after a while. So I am going two weeks strong of not self harming, after a year of “sobriety.” I hate screwing up.