I am so sick of all this stress; honestly it’s getting way too much! I can’t take it. I’m tired of always trying to be someone I’m not- putting a smile on my face every day, that ugly stupid smile and the face framing it. I just don’t see how I’m going to get through this whole self injury issue. Do I even have the desire to change? I don’t, and that’s the sickest thing about this whole situation. I don’t want to change. I feel weirdly comforted in my scares as if they tell my life story or even just a security blanket that lets me know if life ever gets to hard it will be alright, because I have my little getaway.  I’m just so tired of looking in the mirror and feeling so nauseated by what I see in it. What have I done with myself? This is NOT me; I am not the person I was. I am sick of all the school work that I feel like I fail at all the time. I am sick of all the thoughts of wanting to go and play on a sports team but I’m too scared of what I will look like doing it. Or just the simple thought of not being able to get up and walk across the room in class because I’m that intimated by what people are seeing and saying about me. I am always annoyed with everyone. Today I cried three different times, not to mention that I cry pretty much every day. I don’t let people see it of coarse because Liz is the girl that is sociable and nothing can bring that girl down. She stands on her own two feet. Yeah right!!!!  That’s why I have injuries and still thirsting to self injure. It’s like that’s not enough for me.