I had a fight with one of my friends today. Her other friend thought I said something bad about my friend, but I didn’t. But my friend won’t listen to me. She knows I SI and I told her that doing this makes me want to SI, but she doesn’t care. This got me wondering, “Who are my real friends?”. Has my friend been lying to me? I was also thinking about all of the people I’ve told about my SI. Some people I thought cared and were my friends, others I accidentally blurted it out (I regret those ones) Out of all the people I’ve told, only one has actually cared. I only started being friends with her in like October. This is a different person than the one I got in a fight with. I should be more careful about who I choose to be my friends. I just want people to care about me. Every morning, I wake up wishing I was someone else. Someone with a great life, someone with no problems. What if I changed from me, to someone better? What if I didn’t SI on the evening of September 25, 2010? How would my life be different? I just want to go back to the day where this all started and stop myself.
if your friend says that she doesn’t care if you SI youself then that means that she isn’t a real friend. the good kinds of friends will care about you and worry about you SI yourself. try to be more careful with who you tell because some friends that you thought were your friends will just slap you in the face with your own information (SI) and make you want to SI more. And i wonder, too, if my life would have been different if i didn’t start in the first place. also, thanks for the reply. 🙂
I’ve also thought about what I would tell my 14 yr old self if I could go back to that day.