I’ve come to realize I haven’t felt sadness in a long long time.

Sadness, as in, feeling down, crying, moving on.

If I’m faced with a situation where most people would feel sad, I don’t. I feel depressed.

Depressed, as in, lack of motivation, feeling worthless, and the inability to move on for hours, days, weeks.

I don’t understand this. I’m on an ANTIdepressent… ANTI.. it was suppose to fix this.

It’s not like I’ve just started and I’m impatient with results. I’ve been on the same medication for over two years. It helped with my anxiety, which then helped me stop self-injuring. I’ve heard and read time and time again that people self harm for different reasons. I was one that self harmed because I had too much feeling to deal with. Now, all I feel is depressed. Numb almost. Which is now making me want to self harm to feel SOMETHING. Is it possible for reasons to change?

Also.. that picture, it’s not up there anymore, but if you’ve been on here for awhile you know what one i’m talking about. the one with the two girls. they were like in leaves or something. i saw it in a picture frame at a store. you know, those pictures that come in the frames?  i saw that same exact picture. Sort of caught me off guard… that little thing had nothing to do with anything else i was saying.