Every time I try and be happy it always ends up crashing one way or another.  I try and make people around me proud for not S.I but the harder the problems get the harder it is to stop. I feel so alone in this world, like no one will ever be there for me. I feel SO ugly, like ALL THE TIME! I can’t stand the way I look, or talk, or anything about myself. I hate myself and I don’t know why. Sometimes I wish I could just be deleted from this world but yet I know that I was placed here for a reason. I might not see it now but hopefully the time will come when I can’t speak words of love over myself instead of hate. I’m only 15 now- I pray my life won’t always be like this. I pray to God every night for safety for next day emotional, and physically! It’s been helping I guess.. The more I draw closer to God the better I feel.