most of you have read my story before. in recap i was sexually assaulted and my family found out about 3 months ago. I’m 12. i’ve SI’ed for about 2 years. at first it wasn’t from depression but for rituals. Iused to be Gothic. I’ still figuring ot what’s going on with that. I just found out about 30 minutes ago that I’m clinically Bipolar.  i hate therapy. it doesn’t help me. i Sill SI. writing is my only let out. I honestly have three friends. One of them is my ex boyfriend he left me for his ex girlfriend who wanted him back. He’s now my best friend and knows me better then all of them. Recently he told me he still loved me still. The problem is i want him to but i don’t want him too. it’s hard to explain. The other one of my best friends is the other guy im in love with he’s hard to love but i find that lovable. my other best friend is the only girl. she’s depressed too. it’s how we became so close.  I’m lost every one wants me to quit but i can’t.