ive been doing good lately. i havent SIed in 10 days. i really am excited about having an SI free life. i know im going to struggle but i know now that i need to try to stop for myself. ill go day by day. im kinda freaked because i remember last time i really tried stopping and it…yeah no bueno. im starting school in 11 days. im freaked about that… meh. ive been doing better with the whole self esteem thing kinda, its still low but compared to what it was its getting good. i dont know i guess whats been on my mind is that i feel like i dont belong in the place i live and the people i live with. i live with my “family”. not that they feel like that but things are the way they are but i can be better than that and grow and stuffz. just because i dont connect with my family doesnt mean i cant connect and make connections with others. i love my friends and i have deep rooted relationships with them and i am happy. for once there is a seed of real true happieness.