I haven’t been on here for awhile. And for awhile I’ve been doing okay. Schools starting soon and I’m terrified to go back. I keep trying to convince my parents to let me open enroll in a new school but they won’t let me. I want to start over at a new school, where people don’t know about me SI’ing. Chances are that word will get out soon enough even if I switch schools because there is always someone that notices. I still want to switch schools and escape part of my past. I feel like I’m always running away from myself. No matter how fast I run, my past always catches up with me and drags me down. I can’t escape my memories, I can’t wish away the scars, I can’t get away and I feel like if I can’t get away from what started SI that I’ll never stop SI’ing.