So I went to I.O.A. for my birthday wich was on the 18th.I had really strong urges while we were there.My older sister kept on yelling at me for NO REASON!! I was ready to yank her head off.Then she struck me she told me not to lag behind,and to get up front.She had been like practically yelling that me all day even though I was perfectly fine.So when she told it to me my autimatic reflex was to yell right back at her I yelled I AM!!!! This is the sister who has always respected me,given me addvice,and protected me from my father.Doesn’t feel good at all to be yelled at practically all day by the sister you love THE MOST.Out of all of my 4 sisters I love her the most like relationship wise.Cause obviously I love all my sisters,but it just makes it even better that the sister I love the most is one of my half sisters.I just really couldn’t take it,and I was ready to cry.Then I just felt the need to injure.When I got home more yelling.I went to take a shower more yelling.I got out and had bad urges.Ugh! I really hate these urges.I didn’t really wanna get help anymore,but now I do.We went out to eat then with this girl who I haven’t seen in about a year.I was just to myself,and my friend was just like what’s wrong? I said nothing,but obviously that was a lie.She kept asking me over and over and I kept giveing her the same answer.And oh ugh I had to eat I told my mom i’m having problems with food. She got all mad,and stuff so as painful as it was for me I ate.I ate just for my mom,but very slowly. So I feel pretty accomplished today,but I still really want to injure.