I don’t understand why I feel so depressed all the time. I haven’t really had anything tragic in my past that would make me the way I am. It’s almost like I just started failing at … life. I get so confused all the time as to how I should feel. People ask why I’m depressed and all I can ever say is “because of me.” I don’t even make sense anymore, I’m sad becasue of the way I am, because of how lonely I am, I’m just falling apart all over the place. My parents think that I’m “distant” and don’t show feeling for them as much as I should. I just don’t know how to express anything anymore. I’m so depressed with everything that I just can’t seem to relate to anyone which I guess is the reason that I’m so distant from my parents. I want to be closer to them, to people I just can’t seem to find a connection. I haven’t SI’d in quite awhile but that doesn’t make it go away. I thought that maybe if I got myself to stop for awhile it’d make everything better and the depression would go away, but it’s still there. It’s heavier and more oppressive now that I don’t have any way to relieve myself of it. I tried hanging out with people that I used to consider friends, but it only made me more sad. They’ve all grown close together and I’ve just becomed distanced. I got offered to go to prom and I said no, because I knew that I’d be sad and ruin it for whoever I went with. I just hate being depressed, I feel so worthless all the time. I’m constantly passing up oppurtunities that most people would grab because I just can’t get my head on straight to see that it may be good. I can’t remember the last time I was truly happy, I know I’ve been happy before. Which makes it all the harder, knowing that happiness was once in my grasp and knowing that I let it slip away.