i just for no reason the past few days ive been getting hit with random waves of pure sadness. and ever since i went to the doctors a few weeks ago and my dad saw the markings on me i lied to him about it has just all gone down hill. i bottle everything up and right now im just about to burst at the seams… i want to SI so badly… but ive pretty much promised 2 ppl i really truly care about i wouldnt but i dont know what else to turn to anymore i dont wanna shut down because when i come back its only a matter of time before it all comes crashing back down on me. and i dont want to let them down either… i feel like no matter what i do where i go or who i see i always find some way to let them down even my parents… and i cant write anymore i havent in like a year because they go through my everything and read it so i just really dont know what to do. and im trying so very hard but im so stressed with everything…. and i just cant take it anymore… someone… please help me… i really need it about now… just anything that can possibly keep me from doing this again…
i had that problem too. my parents would go through all my notebooks and read everything i wrote. so i pretty much found this blog around that time. as long as you make sure you clear your history on your computer if its a shared computer they will never know about this site, and if they do they wont know your user name. so in my opinion, writing what you used to write on here should help. and well if you want to email me you can whenever you want =] iheartwater@hotmail.com
good luck and stay strong. <3
my parents only act super cautious around me now. its like im different to them somehow. like i have to gaurd what i say… and how i feel. it makes me sad. i need help more than ever… i feel the sadness rising up like water
hello i came across your post and can relate. i know my family just cares about me but i don’t feel i have anyone to talk to cuz i don’t want to disappoint them. i just feel like a disappointment. i haven’t “si” in over a month. i have moments of extreme happy highs and then i get down. it’s like i want to talk to my family but i can’t. i know they go through my things cuz they are worried but i need space and privacy. i get so angry even tho i know they do it cuz they are scared.
i let them down… and i got my computer taken away and thank you guys for caring and yeah… i know i get so high but know its not gonna last long and just hit rock bottom…. but im good for now…. 🙂 like really ^^ but again thank you guys sooo much