so i had this semi long post about all my thoughts and feelings today, then my internet connection dropped. oh well. i got it all out. the urge to si is gone now, at least for now.  theres a line in a song that goes:

 “Get caught in the race
Of this crazy life
Trying to be everything can make you lose your mind
I just wanna go back in time”

and everytime i hear it, it makes me smile. i dont know why.  i want to go back in time so bad. back in time would be great.  about 8 years ago.  before this addiction.