Things were going so well for a while.
But I’ve started SIing again.
I am SO angry at myself. Not for the SI. Just for being me. I’m just full of anger, and I HATE MYSELF!!!
I feel completely worthless. Sometimes I think out society kinda tells women “if you’re not beautiful, you’re not worth the air you breathe.” Like, no other kind of accomplishment matters unless you’re pretty and feminine. I am neither.
I am worthless. I can’t push the bad thoughts out of my head to focus on anything. I can’t go anywhere where there’s people because I will full-out PANIC.
Life seems…pointless & there’s no one to talk to. I’ve lost contact with most of my friends and my mom would just make me feel guilty for thinking this stuff.