So I told myself I was going just to forget about all of this. I told myself I was going to put that mask back up and tell everyone I’m fine. But then I told my friend again. Gave her an update. Not only that but I’m so distracted in school now, I can never concentrate. I’m almost at the point of giving up in school, but that would mean next year would be a repeat and that would be so humiliating. But I just feel like I can’t do anything more.
I’ve tried countless times to stop, each time getting back into it it gets worse. So what now? What happens next? I’ve never really been one to take a step forward, never one to be ‘aggressive’. I’ve reached out for help a couple of times, and they think I’m doing okay. But if they just saw the truth. I don’t know what to do, and I need to be pushed in the right direction. I’m just spinning in circles. What now? How do I find hope in this darkness, in this never ending hole? How do I move on? I just don’t know.
I miss God, my faith, I miss having motivation, I miss caring about life. I miss it all. But I’m lost and confused and I don’t know what to do. I am ready to give up completely.
The best advice I have for you is to keep trying. You are the only one who can control your life and your feelings. If you want to feel “alive” again than you will be able to turn your life around. Good luck.
You know what? The last sentence, i think of that everyday. when did i give up hope? thats my biggest thing. Have you tried talking to a school counselor who can get you help or help you? I guess the best thing i can really say is, your not alone. Dont ever give up completely, email me if you ever just wanna talk: iheartwater@hotmail.com. Good luck and stay strong <3
I agree with iheartwater. You’re not alone, if fact, I think about what you’re thinking everyday. You and I are in the same boat on the subject of school right now. Same thing as iheartwater, If you ever want to talk e-mail me! sincerelyxhannah@yahoo.com
I’d like somebody to talk to that’s in the same situation (:
i feel the same way as lost.and.confused :/