i did it. well almost. i dont think i have ever had a hard time saying anything as i did saying “Take me to a Therapist”. A few nights ago, i just spit the words out randomly to my mother. she looked confused because she doesnt know anything that is going on in my mind.. but it felt good. i just spit it out. I explained that it wasnt her fault, but that i had a lot of anger and i didnt want to start a he said, she said battle between my family.. so i said i wanted to involve someone who could help but didnt have to get personally involved.

I’m nervous now because I will have to face someone in person, a real human interaction that is going to force me to face my feelings. I want help.. but its so scary. You would think that telling my mom would have been the hard part. I’m worried what is going to happen.. do I have to tell them of my SI? Are they going to tell my parents everything i tell them? I have never been to a therapist like this before and dont know what is going to happen. can someone give me pointers on what i should expect, say, not say?

I would like to thank all of you for your support. Everytime i am feeling angry I just give myself a reminder that I need help and deserve it, even though i sometimes dont really believe that. I just want to tell you that you were right, telling my mom was sooo hard. but i think its going to get a lot better. i’m scared, nervous, anxious, upset about talking. but im excited. i just need to know what to expect, please :  )

Thank you for your loving words. And please get help if you need it. You deserve it 🙂 and so do I.

<3