I am the destroyer of my life.

I am the destroyer of me

I always thought destruction was beautiful, turning what once was into something new and beautiful and a new story.

My destruction has no such beauty.

My destruction is more like a horror story.

My future is becoming destroyed, my hopes and dreams are becoming destroyed, my friends ships, my cares, my worth, all of it is becoming destroyed.

And I am the destroyer.

I am not myself in this destruction, something has taken over who I am, this horrible feeling and I am not myself, but all of my destruction is at my hands.

I am trying to find some help while in this battle with myself, but It seems I am losing.  Everything I once had is slipping through my fingers.

And I am the destroyer