So yesterday something big happened at my house… In the past few weeks, my father hasn’t been checking me for any signs of self-injury.. Because I felt he would just forget, I started up again… Not a good idea. Yesterday, he told me that his girlfriend told him he should check me, so he did… And I was so scared, but I had no idea things would blow up the way they did…

He asked if he could check me, and I was scared… I had to let him, though… So he saw them and at first things were fine… He asked why I did it, and I told him it was because of how stupid he was making me feel, and yelling at me for unnecessary things… Later I went on to mention that I broke up with my boyfriend, and that was part of it, because of the stress of that. But he got angry with me and took me out into the living room and I was forced to sit there while he screamed at me… He swore at me, and then took a big vase-thing (I was too scared to look at him and what he was doing, I’m assuming it was a vase) and threw it on the ground… He asked me to help him, then said “OH WAIT ITS SHARP!!” He threatened to take me to a hospital and have me committed to a psyche ward… I told him I didn’t need to go… And luckily he didn’t take me to one. Then, He took my arm and grabbed a hold of it and started dragging me because he wanted to get some coffee, and I didn’t have any shoes on, so I told him I needed to get my shoes on. So I ran to my room, where he followed shortly after… He screamed at me to go faster, but I stayed at my pace, too trapped by fear to move any faster. I walked with my arms folded, hunched over, crying, afraid of him taking me to a hospital… But instead we went to a gas station. I went inside with him, bawling, then he went up to the counter and asked the woman at the register for a pack of cigarettes. This is bad because he had quit smoking for over a year… And I was making him start again… He said “It’s time to start smoking again.” he turns to me and yells “JULIA’S GONNA HURT HERSELF! SO I’M GONNA HURT MYSELF!” right in front of the woman, who I’m sure was so confused… We went home where some more screaming went on, and he threatened to make me stay at his house for the weekend, when legally I’m supposed to go to my grandparents… I didn’t want to stay there… I was afraid. This whole time, his girlfriend wasn’t there… So it wasn’t until my grandpa picked me up that she would have arrived… So I’m sure when I go home that there will be more yelling and more rules. But anyway, so my dad called my counselor that I only had one session with so far… He said he didn’t know what to do with me. They talked for a little, then my counselor and I talked. I told him that my dad grabbed me, and he said that 911 couldn’t do anything unless he actually hit me… I was scared he was going to hit me, but he never has… But he’s never grabbed me like that before… I have an appointment with him next week but I’m so scared… I can’t take it at home anymore… Luckily my counselor convinced my dad to let me go to my grandparents… I don’t know what’s going to be waiting for me when I get back on Sunday… I need support and advice from you guys, please…