i honestly dont know what to do anymore i’ve been fighting with my boyfriend alot and makes me want to do it more well he said he thinks i should get help and i agree but then he wants to tell his mom cuz she’s on of those  phyiatrist (sorry cant spell)  and well maybe it would be good if i talk to someone but i just  dont want her to know everything . My boyfriend thinks that  i can stop it and i cant the urges make it so  hard i try to keep busy but i’m so drained and tired i just wanna sleep all the time..  i got in a huge fight with him last night so i stayed with my grandparetns to exscape and i sat out-side all night crying and sitting on the swing watching  cars past and thinking about SIing but i didnt i’m so proud i didnt do it but i still have the erge and i want to so bad.