In March, I will have not self injured for 4 years. This seems like a great accomplishment…but I still think about self injuring every day. Especially lately….its constantly on my mind. I have a lot of other issues with anxiety and panic attacks and lately I’ve been so numb. I’m completely unmotivated. I think of things I’d like to do or projects I’d like to start and they seem great…until I actually try to do them. I stop and would rather just sit here doing nothing. I don’t even know what I do all day. I don’t remember where the hours go. Its starting to cause problems in my marriage because my husband doesn’t know what to say to make me act “normal” again. I only know one thing that will make me feel again and it’s the one thing I’m trying to stay away from. Will I ever get past this? Will I ever be able to not have SI constantly on my mind?