i feel like i’m losing the people i trust. a lot of people know about me siing now. and after i tell each person our relationship is strained. i keep thinking that i can trust people. and then i lose their trust, and vice versa. they say they won’t tell anyone else and then they do. i hate this. and after it tell them i’ll stop for like a week. and then i’ll start again and disappoint them. and as i continue to disappoint them they talk to me less and stop encouraging me to stop. i feel like i’m losing them. and every single person i’ve felt like i can trust loses my trust. every one. i feel like i’m alone without any help. like no one cares. but i know that’s not true. i know someone cares. they just… aren’t very good at showing it i guess.
Some people just get scared when we show them our scars, scared of how much pain we are in, and they dont know what to do. They then become scared because they feel like they cant help so then they just walk out on us..its tough and has happened many times to me but do know that its not because they no longer care its because they feel theres nothing they can do for you. Hang in there and hopefully one day youll find someone that will stay there long enough to help you through:)
I”m actually having the same problem right now, so I know what your saying… it makes a lot of sense to me. A lot of people who find out and promise not to say anything and actually do say something only because they dont think there is anything else that they can actually do… but i find that the people who mattter most to me are the ones who dont say anything and just hold my hand along the way ,you know what i mean? i ahve lost some really important people to me through this and its terrible, tragic, and i hate it, but hang on to whoever you do have and know that there are other people who feel the same way as you, and were here for you and vise versa. my email is nicole.katie.konstantino@gmail.com if you want to talk i’m here, because i could use some help too! 🙂
i feel the exact same way as you. some of my closest friendships have become strained to a point where we cant really talk about anything anymore unless its something general…like homework…or the weather. i have had a friend offer help, but i pushed it away and now i feel really bad. If anyone offers you help-even if you dont believe its genuine- take it! From there you will be able to find out about how much they care and you will feel much better. Keep testing who your friends are i guess, and you can help yourself out. im still working on this, and have yet to figure out who my friends are. hope this helps and keep trying(: