I dont really know wat to do anymore. i injured on the 15th of dec. im not really sure but i’ve crashed. i was clean from 11-8-08 when my bf at the time made me quit and has been the only person to make me stop or even want to stop.
but when we broke up a year later i crashed and fell apart. how could i let a guy destroy me so much? but truth is i was broken to begin with, my family is very messed up and broken. so all he did was put me together with glue. and when he left i fell apart again.
i have injure myself too much. i dont know how to get help and im scared to death to get it. but if i keep going at the rate i am i dont know if i’ll make it till im 18.
i love myself i do. but right now i cant stand the sight. i know i need help. i just want my old life back.
Did you feel better when you weren’t self-injuring (relationship or no relationship)? That feeling better won’t go away unless you start or continue hurting yourself again.
The fact that your boyfriend made you stop troubles me. No one can actually force you to do anything- boyfriend or none, you stopped self-injuring as your own choice. Therefore, you do have the power to continue to choose not to self-injure.
Congratulations on staying safe for over a year- you deserve to feel very good about yourself for that. And don’t let a boy dictate how you choose to live your life- live it well, and stay safe because you deserve to be safe. And hang in there as far as the break-up goes. It may take a while, but it will stop hurting.
Good luck!
-Steph