I went to s.a.f.e. almost a year and a half ago, and haven’t si’d at all in over six months. I would go weeks at a time without even thinking about si, and even then most of the time i didnt consider doing it, i was just thinking about all that i had been through. But lately it has been a daily struggle not to si. I try to sleep so i can stay numb. I’m happy for short periods of time still but they are getting fewer, and farther between. I’m a dancer and that is the one thing that still makes me happy, but if i SI i will have to be really carefull to hide my scars/injuries, because leotards don’t cover much. I just wish i could do away with my problems for good, but right now things are getting unbearable.
hey there,
Congrats on not S.I.ing!!! that’s great. I wish I were as strong as you are. I’m a dancer, too, and it’s also the one thing that makes me happy. I’ve recently found pleasure and release in drawing and writing poetry, too, as well as hanging out with my best friend. I know how it feels to have to fight the urges every single day, and the pressure of having to hide and cover the scars and injuries up with only wearing dance clothes. My contemporary teacher lets me wear layers if I S.I., because she know I S.I., but my other teachers are pretty strict, and I wouldn’t want to ask to wear layers. I’m sorry, I’m just rambling on, but I just wanted to comment cuz I’m a dancer, too, and I was happy to find someone on here who shared my passion and who has gone for over six months!
Congratulations again, and stay dancing, strong, and positive!
Staystrong