i swore i wouldnt do this again      

i just helped my friend through a horrible ordeal, i had to take her to the hospital

as i saw her in pain from a procedure they had to do, i could feel myself die a little

another friend tried to kill herself this weekend.

for some of my friends, i am the only person they can come to for help

as much as i need this to validate my existance, it is slowly killing me.

now here i am, with that familiar feeling from injuring…  like my own old friend to turn to