hi it’s me again…i’m 22…i’m at college today (only here on tuesdays and thursdays for class)
i feel so left out most of the time…i’ve been here for 4 years and i don’t have a single friend that i hang out with here.
i drive here, go to class, and drive home.
i know i’m secluding myself sometimes, but it just seems easier that way. at least if i’m by myself i can’t say or do stupid stuff…when i say something and people ignore me or make fun of me, it makes me want to SI more so i just try my best to keep my mouth shut.
that’s better than getting hurt right?
i’ve been thinking alot about a different form of SI and it seems really plausable right now…
is it bad that i’m getting addicted? (well, i know it is, i just don’t want it to be true.)
sorry, alot of what i’ve said is sorta rhetorical (i already know the answer to)…
i’m just so messed up right now. i love and hate being the way i am.
<3
L
I have found that having friends and people to talk to has been a major part of my healing. I also know how it feels to seclude yourself. It seems easier. But, in a way, youre only hurting yourself more by doing that. You should try to make an effort to talk to people more, to put yourself out there. Because you may find people who can really help you, listen to you and give you advice, or just be supportive. Give it a try. 🙂
Oh, and how do you post a blog? I think im technology illiterate. I cant figure it out haha. Oh jeez. :/
hi.
thank you for the reply. i just feel so ugly and afraid to meet new people…everytime i make a new friend, they always desert me for someone better or i say something stupid and screw up the relationship and then i regret even being their friend in the first place.
a good friend is hard to find.
posting a blog???…you mean on this website???
after you log in, you click the “welcome” button….the click the “visit our blog” button under it. you will have a list to the right of the posts. scroll down to the bottom where it says “Meta” and click the “Site Admin” button and you can type post one.
is that what you wanted to know? hope it helped. sorry if i’m wrong and you were asking something else…
<3
U just have stay strong try get off it im injurer I strougle w. Ever day if u need some talk to email. Me crazygurl916889@yahoo.com my aim oceancitybum889
yeah, thank you, thats what i was looking for… much appreciated.
A good friend IS hard to find. so you have to look even harder, try even harder. I have days where i feel disgusting, stupid, worthless… then ill talk to my boyfriend or best friend and I will feel soooo much better. When i first starting to SI, my parents found out and made me change schools. I started seeing a therapist and everything too. but i didnt really want to talk to her; i didnt want to talk to anyone. But I knew I had to make friends. So, even though i didnt want to talk to anyone, I forced myself to start making friends. And i truly believe those friends have saved me.
You just have to have faith in yourself and try.
You can do it 🙂