Well, its been a year since the first time I injured. looking back, im amazed that so much can change in such a short time. I went from a relatively happy teen to a depressed girl just a little too mature for her own good. I have scars to show from what I went through, and I dont know if they’ll ever go away.
Part of me wants them to stay. Its like, i look at them and think, “It was so bad, im never going back to that…” And I dont think i will, honestly. The last time i SId, it was from more of a numbness than anything. I didn’t feel emotion, and it scared me. With my scars I’ll remember how scared i was that i was in real danger, than my mom would have to find out… 

Ive gotten better. It was like someone finally snapping me out of it. I still feel the need to Si sometimes, but… I dont.  Plus, my mom almost found out. She decided to go through my computer history and found a ling to this blog. It freaked her out. Lucky for me she didn’t really look to hard. I had to make up some pretty good lies, but she finally left me alone about it. She cant know, because now I know what she thinks of it. Its horrible to her, sinful in a way. I want this all behind me. This year. Ill tell someone eventually, someone i trust completely, but not her. Not now. maybe one day. For now my priorities are staying alive and well, and for once, i feel like things are gonna be ok.